The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly

I turned 36 on Friday.  Yep, I turned 36.  Not sure how I really feel about that quite honestly, but for some reason the song..."it's my party and I'll cry if I want to", keeps popping into my head. 

Yeah, your damn right I'm gonna cry if I want to...no party needed here, just a good old fashioned cry sometimes.  Holy shit, I'm turning 36 and apparently I have a lot to cry about (not really...keep reading, you'll see what I mean :)).  I could have cried for a variety of reasons...the good, the bad and the ugly.  Literally!! 

The Good...

• I cried on the morning of my birthday when my dad called me for the first time in almost 17 years (by my estimation!)...tears of joy I say...tears of absolute overwhelming joy!!!  (I've missed having him and my family in my life and I was reminded on a day that I didn't want to celebrate, how truly lucky I really am!)
• I didn't cry as much as laughed (and smiled) and laughed some more...the good kind of laughter (the kind that comes from my belly and makes my crow's feet stand out...more on that later), when I found myself chillin on a whim on my friends couch being licked to death by the world's most awesome dog!  Good times!!!!  
• I laughed my ass off when I found myself chillin with my family at my sister's place getting "the business" by her dog Ugga (a pure bread American Bulldog who had NOT been fixed)...he's a very happy boy and likes to share his love and make new friends...by humping them (however, this is probably not very different from guys in general, no matter what the species...I think the male motto in life is "let's be friends and hump"...I could be wrong, but I seriously doubt it, haha :)). 
• I cried when my mom and I had a serious heart to heart discussion over our differences (while she was helping me pick out a kick ass Android phone for my birthday...yay, Angry Birds!!!...stupid angry little fuckers are a serious time suck, but they're so cute and fun...and Facebook goes mobile...sheeat, I may never have to leave my bed for any reason :)).  Tears of relief and joy.  Our recently deteriorating relationship was largely a product of poor communication, and now that we're back on the same page...tears of overwhelming joy filled me again. 
• I cried when I picked up my boy from school for my scheduled weekly custody switch...tears of happiness, love, joy and hugs for sure!!!  The best kind of tears I've ever found.  My heart was full full full!!!!!!  So full, it leaked a little out my eyes.  My boy returned the favor by throwing his arms around me in a big hug, then he gave me a wink and wished me happy birthday...BEST BIRTHDAY GIFT EVER!!!!!! 

The Bad...

• Ok, seriously I got nothin...maybe a bit of a sour stomach from rich food overindulgence on the eve of my birthday (cherry cheesecake goes straight to the thighs, what???), but that's all I can think of for the bad.  If I really think about it, things with me are pretty darn good (see the list above for confirmation).  Sure, there have been a few speed bumps here and there over the past year, but what journey doesn't have potholes. 

The Ugly...

• I mentioned the crow's feet right...yeah, turning 36 isn't without it's share of personal physical changes.  There's the slower metabolism, the slight loss of muscle definition, no matter how much I try to fight it, the achy joints, and let's not forget the saggy boobs (we must NEVER forget the gravitational pull of life on our body parts...screw you Issac Newton, you suck!)

Yeah, I could have spent the day (and I could probably spend the entire year) crying over spilt milk, saggy boobs and things in my life that have touched me emotionally over the past year, but honestly, I'm just not really a crier (unless my boy's involved, then for some reason the tears come on a whim without fail).  I'm a laugher and a smiler.  Most of the time if something touches me, I'm so darn tickled from the inside that burst into laughter (or a huge ass smile).  I've been told that I wear my heart on my sleeve, and it's prolly true, only no matter what's going on in my world, my heart is almost always filled with joy, so that's what's on my sleeve.  I've also been told that sometimes I smile too much...really????...is this even possible??

In the end, turning 36...not so bad after all.  I have a feeling that it's going to be a kick ass year!!  I'm surrounded by amazing people and friends who always keep my heart full.  I plan on laughing and smiling from ear to ear all year long.  If 40 is the new 30, then 36 must be the new 26...works for me.  :)