Ok, single ladies out there...there is a lesson to be learned here...mainly that it's good to know people, and you never know when those random Facebook friends might step in and save the day unexpectedly.
Most people have a love or hate relationship with Facebook, you either love it and are a junkie (for a lot of people I know FB has become the standard form of communication with their friends, replacing even emails and phone calls), or you hate it and badmouth the crap out of it.
I like FB for the networking and communication opportunities it offers. After all, because of FB I was able to track down my long lost family (through a random search one night for anyone with my brother's name) and begin to reconnect with them...this in itself makes FB one of the greatest gifts on earth for me this year!!! (Michael, again, thank you-thank you-thank you!!!...I love you!!! Your a fantastic man and the best brother a girl can hope for...by opening your heart and FB friendship to me, you showed me this year what the true meaning of love, compassion and family is. Love you Lil Bro!!). I now have many new "friends" that I am related to who I cherish dearly. (Yes, it was a very good Christmas indeed for me this year!)
Aside from the goodness of allowing me to reconnect with a long lost family, FB has also given me the opportunity to simply "keep in touch" with acquaintances of all kinds that I have met during my many adventures. One of those acquaintances is a friend I will call E. I have only met E in person a few times through a mutual friend, but last night I could not have been happier to walk into my favorite local drinking hole and see E. (It's always nice to walk into a bar and see a familiar face :)).
Since I was supposed to be meeting friends there, we simply said hi to each other and went on our separate ways. Him back to his seat with his own friends near the bar, and me to find a spot to land with a dollar pint in hand to wait for another FB friend to arrive.
Shortly after finding an open table and getting settled in with my beer, I was immediately swarmed by five young and very aggressive guys who wanted to sit with me and wait with me for my friend(s) to arrive. These feisty young men would not take no for an answer and eventually there was no line between them and my own personal space. Suddenly, I was sort of wishing I had stayed home. Instead, I sat there waiting anxiously for my phone to buzz telling me that either my friend F needed a ride home from a different establishment, or that my other FB friend G (the one I was supposed to be meeting), was on his way to save the day...any excuse would have been welcome at this point. No such luck.
Now, I'm a friendly girl and all, and I like to flirt, but telling me how well hung you are, is NOT going to make me want to have a conversation with you...like AT ALL!!! (Note to all the single men out there...mentioning your manhood in the first 3 minutes of meeting a girl is the WORST possible pick up line!!!...the WORST!!...unless you would like to get kicked in said manhood.)
The situation quickly became uncomfortable to say the least. All attempts I made to distance myself from these guys were failing. I could not shake them and believe me I tried! I even lied and told them that the friend I was meeting was my boyfriend (sorry G!!!)...no such luck!! (These Mofo's were really starting to get on my nerves and one in particular was on the verge of getting punched in his manhood that he would not shut up about, if he did not remove his hands from my shoulders like NOW!)
Finally, I was able to use my empty beer glass as an excuse to escape to the bar for a refill. Enter E!!! (My hero!...even if he was wearing a Vikings jacket, haha! :)) After telling E about the crazy ass mother phuckers upstairs who were trying to get all up in my business, E and his friends took me in, offered me a beer and a place to sit and let me chill with them for the rest of the evening (my friend G got tied up at work and couldn't make it after all, boo!...yes, I seem to have an alphabet theme happening here with my friends...E, F, and G. LOL :)).
I ended up having a great time hanging out with E and his buddies, and actually relaxed enough to enjoy myself (until a bar fight broke out...another guy bragging about his manhood to the wrong person I assume!...guys are so dumb sometimes).
Because hindsight is always 20-20 it's easy to sit back now and reflect on the mistakes I made while dealing with the aggressive a-holes, and to also wonder about their intentions or what could have happened. I have now developed new bar rules for just such situations: 1) it's perfectly ok to be rude in a situation like this and tell someone to phuck off if it feels right, 2) MUST invent a good bar name (open to suggestions on this one), and 3) always have a friend "on call" or a back up plan in place when walking into a bar alone (knowing that E was right downstairs, made it much easier to break from this pack of aggressive dudes with confidence). (Feel free to add your own rules in the comments section.)
Nothing bad happened to me last night, and I have no idea what Mr. "I'm hung like a horse"'s intentions were, but I can easily see where it could be easy for a girl (or guy for that matter) to get distracted enough to have something questionable slipped into their drink. These guys were creepy and aggressive in ways I really did not appreciate and every one of my instincts told me to get the hell out of there ASAP...I'm just glad I'm smart enough to listen to my gut, because some days I'm all about taking some risks and embracing my new adventure with open arms and reaching just outside my comfort zone to push my own boundaries and grow, but last night I guess was not one of those days, and thank God/Buddha/whoever you want to pray to for that!!! Most of all thank you to my new best-est FB friend E!!!
Note to all the hot single mommas and ladies out there (and yes, aren't we ALL hot?! :)): If you are in a situation that makes you uncomfortable and your gut tells you to get the hell out of there...for god's sake, listen and RUN!!!! Run as fast as you can! I'm learning during this single hood adventure that there are A LOT of creepers out there...a lot more than I remember from my college days. UFF DA!
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